Three things you need to truly live.
I saw a search term on my site that said “three things you need to truly live”. To steal a cliché from the real-estate world, the 3 things we need to truly live are thought control, thought control, thought control. Everything you want to be, feel, experience and achieve all start with thoughts.
Emotions start with thought – As Dr. Randy Carlson says, “It is impossible to experience an emotion without experiencing the corresponding thought first”. The time it takes for a thought to turn into an emotion is practically instantaneous. You can’t feel angry without having an angry thought. It is nearly impossible to control what thoughts pop into our heads, but we can control what we do with them once they are there. It is absolutely possible to let them pass by, or to dwell on them, increasing their intensity. What you chose to do will determine your emotions for that day, which in turn determines how you feel. So if you truly want to live free of an emotion that plagues you, you need to learn to let go of the negative thoughts and you will feel better.
Thoughts control the life you live – Thoughts of fear keep us from doing a multitude of things. We are afraid to try new things that give us amazing experiences and would make us feel truly alive. Thoughts keep us alone because we are afraid to ask someone out or are afraid to try a dating service. Thoughts keep us in the same mundane place. We are afraid to take risks that would help us grow and move on from the stagnant place we are in.
Thoughts control our appearance – We think it is too hard to diet an exercise, yet millions of people do it everyday. We think there is not enough time to get in shape, yet millions of people make the time everyday. We think that giving up certain things to make time to exercise is not worth it. We think our cravings outweigh the need to not eat something. So in the end, we choose, with our thoughts, to stay overweight. We can’t get in shape without first having the thought that we are “going to get in shape no matter what”.
Thoughts control our health – from choosing what we eat, choosing to exercise or not, choosing to have a negative outlook on life, to choosing to be stressed by every little thing that bothers us, all effects our short term and long term health. It is our own thoughts that make us do what we do, not some outside source making us do what we do or making us feel a certain way. We choose the thoughts to dwell on and the thoughts to let go of.
Thoughts control our relationships – once we are past the puppy love stage, we find that we are with a real human being that is just as flawed as we are. We chose, by our thoughts, how to treat our significant other, and since most people treat you the way you treat them, we are choosing how our partner treats us. We can apply our thoughts to making our relationship stronger, or we can apply our thoughts to others outside of our relationship which makes our relationship weaker. We can tear our partner down with our words and actions, which start as thoughts, or we can build them up with our words and actions which also start as thoughts.
Thoughts control our self esteem and self confidence – being afraid of what other people think stems from thoughts. We have a core thought such as “I look stupid” or “I am a failure” and so on. We allow these negative thoughts to define who we are and then we loose our self esteem. Or perhaps we are overweight and that is the sole cause of our self esteem issues. We can choose to look past the shallow judgment of others and recognize our inner qualities, or as stated above, we can choose to get in shape. But our thoughts hold us back, resulting in lack of self esteem and confidence.
I could keep going but think about it for just a second. What separates us, from those that do the things we want to do, act the way we want to act, have the attitude we want to have? It is our mind, our thoughts. Everything we do starts with our thoughts. Our entire existence is directed by our brains. Our brains tell us to breathe, tell our hearts to beat, and tell our muscles to move. It is the same with our lives. Our thoughts decide how we live. If we can take control of our thoughts then we can truly live. If we cannot take control of our thoughts then we cannot truly live. It is that simple. There are plenty of resources on this site, on the web, in books, and on recorded tapes that can teach us to control our thoughts. If you want to change in any way, you must make it your mission, your soul focus to control your thoughts and the rest will follow naturally. Pills, fads, easy outs are always temporary because they do not address the basis of our lives which are our thoughts. To truly live is to take control of our thoughts which take control of our emotions and behaviors which change our lives.
Could you list a couple of the best resources you have found ? I am really struggling “getting out of my own head and it’s debilitating…thx
I sent some resources to your e-mail. I hope they help.
Paul
I couldn’t agree with you more. After years of negative thinking as being the norm most days, I am making a real effort to think positively, let go and disregard negative thoughts and people (as much as that’s possible) and dwell on good things every hour or every day. It truly does make a difference. Powerful advice, thanks for a great post!
Hi Geraldine,
That’s great that you are practicing focusing on the positive! It is not easy, but as you stated, it does make a difference. If we do it long enough, it will become the norm instead of our negative thoughts. I am thankful for the feedback!
Take care,
Paul
Greetings, I LUV YOUR SITE! I am no stranger to M.I. or addictions. Not one Generation of my family has escaped it’s clutches to every degree of the Rainbow. I have a request (may be here & I haven’t seen it) about that “1st Step”. So many people I know can not seem to take that first one…they will never get there without it. Can you blog about the “Get Up, Get Started, Get Going etc….
P.S. you really should write a book!!!
Hi Genny,
Thanks for the comments! I am humbled by them. No, you have not missed it. I have not written about the first step yet. That is actually a great idea! It is, as you say, the hardest one to take. To finally make up your mind and to actually let others know. It is the “letting others know” that shows that you believe you are powerless over your addiction.
I will put one together (as it happened for me anyway) and I hope that it helps someone to turn the train wreck of addiction around.
Thanks again Genny,
Paul
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Thoughts « Elizabeth17peters's Blog said this on April 23, 2011 at 9:07 PM |